#reverb10 – day 5

December 5 – Let Go.

What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

(Author: Alice Bradley)

I let go of sizes. Clothing sizes.

They don’t make any lick of sense. To me. To my baby. To my husband. And the worst part is that I totally know it, but I’d still moan and groan and sob a bit when I saw the numbers/letters that I didn’t want to see.

I’m not a size 6 fit model. I’m not 5’5-5’9, 120-125 lbs with a 34.5-35.5” chest, 26-27.5” waist, 36.5-38” hips and a 28-30” inseem.

I can’t walk into a store and just “go shopping” for fun. I have to stick to certain brands/labels and stay away from others. I can browse in stores and they cross my fingers they sell it online in a tall size. I buy multiple colors of the same items that fit because it makes up for the lack of selection I had in the first place.

But this year, two years after I made a promise to only buy clothing in tall sizes (or that are infamously wonderful for long sizing), I think I’ve finally let go of sizing making any lick of sense.

Today, I tried on an adorable pea coat at Nordstrom. I tried the large first, and it wouldn’t button. So I went to the XL, and it still wouldn’t close. So I put the coat back on the rack, and walked away. I saw a petite 5’4ish gal walk up to the same rack, grab a coat in a size small, and twirl around in happiness once it fit. I felt myself start to get jealous, and then I let it go. Why be mad at the world because you’re just an outlier in this area? I should be lucky that brands I love cater to me in the first place.

So I’ve accepted that buying clothes I love and fit is the only thing I care about. If that means a size 14 at Old Navy and a 6 at J Crew, who the heck cares! I’ll make the clothes work for me and stop worrying about why I stick out in the world … and just stick out.

And maybe I’ll kick up my sewing skills a bit in the meantime and solve the problem myself?


Other readers who are playing along: Michelle at See Michelle Blog, EmilyB at A Leap Begins, Ali at His Birdie’s Nest, Koritsimou at The Pale Wisconsinite, Kelly at Glamour This!, Katie atShe Likes Ruffles, He Likes Truffles, Liz at e.louiseNodakademic,  Kasia at Good Finking, Kate at Marsh Mellow Goodness, Lydia at Nothing Rhymes with Lydia, Jenni at Moonlight & Magnolias, EP at Oh Baby!, Jen at Living a Brighter Life, Holley at Dead Flowers, Tara at Two Wishes, Marissa at marissamakes, Kinzie at KinzieSays, Nellie at Wired, Witty and Well-Dressed and Jen at A Tale of 2 Monkeys. (am I missing you??)

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  • lydia

    I feel ya on the frustration. Old Navy especially frustrates me. I order talls in pants, they drag the ground. I order regulars and they are capris after one wash. Grr.

  • Kelly | Glamour This

    That is a great one! I need to get on that, but sizes seem to be an obsession after a baby. (well in my case anyway)

    You look fab either way, who cares if it’s a 14 or a 6… obviously there’s a problem with sizing the clothes in the first place ;)

  • Megan

    Very odd – I actually had nearly the exact same experience with a coat this weekend. I pulled the Large and couldn’t button it if my life depended on it, but the friend I was with tried it on in a Small and looked adorable (I’ll admit, she’s nearly a foot shorter than me). I definitely felt jealousy, sadness, and general anger at my body/clothes manufacturers/etc – I’ll have to work on letting it go too. I’m impressed you’re able to!
    When I complained about being unable to find a coat that fit, my friend said “Why don’t you just sew yourself one?”… I hadn’t really considered it before, but I found myself browsing pea coat patterns this afternoon. :) If I weren’t so sure it would end in disaster, I’d make coats for the both of us!

  • Coasting anon

    I give you so much credit. I went into Nordstroms for the very first time the other day and tried some things on and nothing even came CLOSE to fitting. I actually said out loud (too loud…the person in the next dressing room heard me, I think) “I’m such a fat piece of crap”. I felt like crying and I ran out of the store, embarassed and convinced that the sales people were al looking at me knowing there was no way I should have been in there because clearly I was too big for anything they have.

    Sad…but true.

    Now, instead of trying to convince myself that I am happy with my looks, I’m just trying to not focus on my looks at all…good or bad. Somedays are better than others.

  • Catherine

    What a great post. I feel that way and I’m probably a foot shorter than you. Everything looks frumpy on me, hits in the wrong places, etc. I’m cutting back on buying normal sizes and trying to find places that do short/petite sizes well.

  • Jen

    I think it is so great that you are letting go of sizes. It is going to give you SO much POWER!

    I usually let the number on the scale take its power over me. Lately though, I haven’t been worrying about that quite so much and instead focus on how I feel. Seems to be working out and it is WAY less stressful!

    P.S. – Sorry about the loss of your bunny!

    P.S.S – I linked over to That Dad and saw your video. Your kid is so cute!! Her laugh is infectious!

  • Katie

    I hear you – don’t get me started on the crazy ridiculous sizing that clothing manufacturers use!

    Shopping used to be fun for me. It still is…for some things..but once I start trying on clothes and realize that the manufacturers apparently don’t make anything that will fit me other than leggings and loose tunics, my heart starts to hurt. I’m pretty much relegated to shopping at Forever 21 (and finding professional clothing in that store is nearly impossible) or to head to the children’s section (um…yeah…I’m wearing a little girl’s dress in my friends’ wedding in April. At least it was cheaper than the women’s sizes…).

    Honestly – it totally frustrates me that men have such standard sizing in comparison! Wouldn’t it be nice to know that you are a 32×30 pant, and pretty much regardless of the store you shop at, that size would most likely fit you? Envy.

  • Julie

    I did this a couple of years ago. I have the opposite problem of you beings that I am only 5 feet tall, on a good day! :) Some things fit in smaller sizes, etc. It was tough but its a good thing! Good for you!